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Send her the full dictionary definition of submissive so she can bat back by compromise. Or at the very least tied to a wall.Įmail is the prime form of sex correspondence between Grey and Steele and the forum for flirting, foreplay and spelling out exactly what you want to do in the bedroom. Do as impossibly good-looking Christian Grey does and draft the dos and don’ts of your dominant–submissive sex games and she’ll be all heart-eyed emojis. Paperwork has been the missing spark from your far-from sizzling sex life. Best if she can keep all these paddles, whips, riding crops and canes your special little secret and sign here… She’ll understand the need for lawyers went she gets a load of the playroom, a citrus smelling, softly lit spot with a large X on the far wall and an 8ft-square iron grid on the ceiling from which hangs a selection of ropes, chains and shackles. Non-disclosure agreements are the new foreplay. “Are you redecorating?” she’ll ask, wholly unaware that two weeks later she’ll be strung up with cable wires having the time of her life in your Red Room of Pain. Better still if her part-time job is at a hardware store into which you can waltz to order up a selection of cable ties, masking tape and five yards of filament rope. Surprise your girl with a visit to her workplace, even if she hasn’t disclosed where that is.
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(it's likely not Dove for Men Extra Fresh.) In the book, she’s not exactly strong on detail so you’ll have to work out what it might be for yourself. Every time Ana’s about to call time on caning-as-foreplay, she gets a whiff of Christian Grey’s “expensive body wash” and is on all fours. Not a male model? Hope lies in an unspecified expensive body wash.Įven if your date might be hesitant about spanking, win her over with a stimulating shower gel. Which might explain why she takes so well to being bossed about so much. In the film, Grey is played by a former male model, Jamie Dornan, who posed in glossy, high-end magazines (including this one). In Fifty Shades, Ana agrees to become the sexual submissive of a man who “looks like a male model in a pose for a glossy, high-end magazine”. If you want to introduce your date to the joys of bondage, it’s good if you’re handsome as hell. After that, it’s a pretty seamless journey to S&M town. “Oh, I exercise control in all things, Miss Steele,” he replies to a question about his charitable work in Darfur. She’s just meekly crept into his office to interview the billionaire CEO for her student mag, and he’s using the opportunity to lay it on thick with barely concealed sex chat at every turn. Women you’ve just met adore thinly veiled chat about your sexual sins.ĭo as Christian Grey, the sexually dominant hero of Fifty Shades of Grey does when he first meets naïve virgin Anastasia Steele, played in director Sam Taylor-Johnson’s big-screen adaptation by Dakota Johnson.